Following prayers, sometimes - though not often - I get praise reports. These are when someone reveals how a prayer was answered. Usually this is from some pastor who has requested prayers for another; sometimes by the person privately. As I stated in my last blogpost, even when I "feel" which way a prayer will be answered, there is always doubt in my mind.
Thus I will say nothing to the person other than " I am praying for you."
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When I received a praise report where they called it "praise report" for the first time. I had a jumble of emotions. First, I was glad; it was good news. Then I racked my mind to see if it matched the "feeling" I may have had when I prayed for that particular request. Honestly, I could not remember. Then part of me argued boastfully, "I do not need to see these praise reports. If God wants me to know, I know. I know Pari hears all my prayers; that is sufficient!"
But another part of me - a part that was being more honest than boastful quietly countered this. "No. I do need them. There is still a great deal of doubt in me. I need these praise reports as witnesses. I need some confirmation for the part of me that deals in THIS life existence to see. I need witnesses to testify that Pari does hear me, and that He does answer prayers."
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It is a bitter pill for the pride in me to swallow, but it is the plain truth. It's a part of being human.
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