Fight

Anyone beyond the "honeymoon" period of a marriage can tell you that there will be fights. Some don't yell at one another; they just talk at each other in loud voices without listening. Some don't talk at all, just scowl.

This past week, my husband and I had a spat. He didn't read the clues that I needed five minutes of uninterrupted time to write a work-related email. He kept asking me questions. Then he told me dinner was ready. Couldn't he see that clearly dinner must wait until I got that email out?

I became exasperated at constant interruptions and snapped at him. He yelled back that perhaps it would be better for him to leave.

After that, he STILL kept asking me questions even though I made it VERY clear I needed to focus on the email. Following this shouting match, he stormed out the door.

At first, I sat in the kitchen after getting the email out, waiting for hubby to come back home. Dinner grew cold and was uneaten that night.

I ate some fruit to get the bitter taste out of my mouth. This was followed by "comfort" cookies. The bitter taste remained.

I expected, when I reached out to Yeshua (Jesus), that He would "side" with me. I needed confirmation that I was right and my hubby was wrong. (Sound familiar?) What I got was a clear picture of what He was seeing. A little sister sulk and and an ego that wanted stroking.

Yeshua was not going to do that. Instead I was given the prompt that I am not thinking with my right mind, letting my ego have the reins instead...

After my husband came back, we reconciled and went for a walk - and talk - together. That was when I learned that my impression was incorrect. My husband never yelled, nor stormed out.

He believed the email was done, as I continued to answer his questions and converse with him. Most of the questions were part of dinner preparation. Then he wondered why I suddenly lashed out viciously when he told me supper was ready.

Being the engineer he is, he proposed a few options (thus the additional questions), including stepping out of the apartment to give me quiet. But I kept snapping back, "I just need five uninterrupted minutes!" So he opted for a walk to give me the space and peace he could see I needed...

This certainly is different than I saw.

My ego skewed my observation. This became a wall that divided us. My ego demanded that I was right, and all others were wrong -- even Yeshua. It would not give up the fight until it had won.

Some may argue that the devil twisted my perception to cause strife. Division and conflict are tools of the trade, and the ego is the gateway into our mind.

But I had Yeshua on my side. And He doesn't coddle when the Truth would set me free. The truth was that I wasn't thinking with my right mind. My perception was distorted.

Before my husband got home, I spent time in prayer with Yeshua. I asked the Spirit to take the negative thoughts from me, so I COULD think with my right mind.

It helped. And gave me a chance to hear the truth.

If only I had done that first, instead of eating all those cookies. Or even before loosing my temper...